I’ve looked after people all my life. My mother. Three brothers. Years and years of it. Eighty eight years of it. It don’t feel right, me lying here. I’m the one supposed to be up and doing things. I don’t want to be a trouble to anyone. I don’t want to cause a fuss.
I look a fright. These are my work clothes. I was doing the cleaning. I can’t go out like this. The doctors won’t want to see me in this skirt. I knitted it years ago. The hems all gone to pot. At least it’s warm, though, which is more than I can say for your ambulance. Put that shoe on for me, will you?
I’m good with figures. That’s my thing. Turning them over in my head, bam. Six eights? Forty eight. I’ve always been good with figures. It just comes natural. Some people sing songs, some fix the electric. I’m good with figures.
It’s changed round here, though. I was born and brought up here, my mum, her mum, all the way back. It’s not nearly as good as it was. Them days, you shared it about. If you had a bit left over and your neighbours had nothing: There you go. It's yours. You looked out for each other. You kept each other going. Now, you look at the news and everywhere it’s the same - bad, bad, bad. The world He made, all gone bad. And then when you think about His Son. Sent down to help. What happens? Nailed to a cross. But the way I see it, you keep out of trouble, do your best, when it’s your time and you’re up there, standing in front of all them angels and whatnot, He’ll nod and go (thumbs up) You’re in, mate. The rest of them? Look out, that’s all I can say.
It’s coming. I can tell. Just looking out this window, I can tell.
13 comments:
Oh dear - I've come over all watery-eyed. Bless her.
She was lovely. It was great to hear the Apocalypse predicted with such a sweet tone of voice!
theres alot of that apocalypse lark atm!
Id agree with her, 'times are a changing!'
for the better or worse?
meh.
VT
Hey Spence,
Morbid as this may sound, I do wonder what the end will be like (obviously not for many decades to come). I think as it is inevitable, I like to at least be able to decide where, as in I'd like it to be at home. My Pops was able to decide. It's sort of like your final act, might bring some contentment or comfort.
She sounded lovely and concerned about how she would look, so sweet.
xx
in the last days, people will prophesy. More and more...
VT - It depends! Some things for the best, some not. The only surety is that change happens, whether we like it or not. I suppose it's how we adapt that's the most important thing.
Jo - There's so much of this in the news at the moment, the whole business of assisted dying &c. I'm definitely of the camp that would like to see a formal set-up, to allow people to arrange a comfortable and harmonious exit strategy. With proper safeguards, of course. There are dangers in loads of areas. But I think you could arrange things so that vulnerable people were protected. I think it's a terrible shame that an easeful death is effectively denied a huge number of people.
Very glad your dad was helped properly. x
Dave - I've heard a couple just in the few years I've been doing this job! But I suppose history's not short of a few examples, though (Nostradamus being the poster-boy of the Apocalyptic Brigade).
There's a great Peter Cook and Dudley Moore sketch about the end of the world ("not quite the conflagration we were expecting") :)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Z3nRjlK3jfY
Thanks v much for all your comments! :)
VT - Thanks v much for the poem on the subject of change. I hope you won't mind that I'm not printing it out here - but for everyone who'd like to have a read, here's the link to the page it appears on your site:
http://acertainstandardofunstandard.blogspot.com/2009/06/another-naff-piece-of-poetry.html
Cripes!
I didnt mean for that!
I didnt even think you'd link the two!
Thank you though spence,
VT
No worries! ;)
Spence, I just found you. Genius idea for a blog, touching, heartbreaking. Bravo.
Thanks Susan! :)
Just found your Blog today - and having digested much of its beautiful prose, I am leaving with a warm, fuzzy feeling and a brighter view of the world around me.
Hi Andy
Thanks v much for the lovely comment! I really appreciate it.
Post a Comment